I’m sat on my bed, it’s comfy… in places. It’s lumpy, bumpy and dips in places where really it shouldn’t if one wants to gain a decent night of sleep without having to move due to the ache that has formed because the mattress really needs replacing. I’m lost in thought, as I listen to my husband and son play football in our little urban garden. I’m on the cusp of reinvention my life has just changed and I’ve had to make decisions. These decisions were four years away just a moment ago, at least that’s what it feels like. A flash in time and four whole years have passed me by. I was reinventing myself then too. Finally having made the decision to go to university as a mature student with my husband’s blessing at the age of 34. I wonder, does reinvention actually exist or am I just flitting across stepping stones each time my life shifts through decisions made or things happening that I cannot control. I’d reinvented myself from school girl to college student. Then student to full time workforce employee. I’d changed jobs and met my now husband, moved out and become an proper adult with bills and rent. Then changed again within three years to become a wife (not that it changed the way my life was progressing) a change in my surname, a new start, a new person, another reinvention of sorts. Then homeowner and the biggest change of all, mother. I had birthed a human and created the biggest change, the biggest reinvention in my life so far. I wasn’t just responsible for myself any longer, my new persona had to keep a small human alive, this little person an extension of myself in a completely new form. That was nearly ten years ago and in those tend years alone I have changed, grown, learnt, and lost. Each layer beginning a new reinvention of my soul and adding yet another layer. With each new choice a new layer added and now as I sit on the cusp of a new layer I feel as though I must let go, release some layers that no longer serve me. But how does one do this? Arn’t all of those layers making me the person I am today, that invisible baggage that weighs you down from the moment you wake to the moment your mind drops into the ether at night. This page, this blog, this insight into my brain, my thoughts my consciousness, this is the way I let go of the past that no longer serves. The losses, the regrets, the people I wish I could hug just one more time. These are the layers of my life and I’m laying them bare.